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Hearts in Winter - Simone Beaudelaire

 

Steamy Contemporary Romance Book Series

Hearts in Winter by Simone Beaudelaire

Series Excerpt

A couple of days later, the Friday of the week before Thanksgiving, Erin made her way into her family's bungalow near the University. Fatigue and worry dragged every step until she felt as though she were trying to wade through molasses.

“Erin, is that you?” her mother called from the living room.

“Yeah, I'm home,” she answered in a tired, listless voice, not caring how bad she sounded. Or how bad I look, dark circles under the eyes, hair all messy from the wind. Ugh. I even managed to spill food on my jeans. All I want is a hot shower and a nap. She trudged into the living room. Valerie sat on the brown leather sofa, her blond highlighted hair pulled back into a clip, plucking her eyebrows.

“What did you need, Mom?”

Valerie glanced up for a moment, and then returned her gaze to her little mirror. “I needed to tell you that we're moving. As part of the divorce settlement, the house is going to be sold and your dad and I will split the money.”

“Where are we going to live? I know of some apartments downtown.” Sean lives there. That would be nice.

“No. Bill lives in Motley. We're moving in with him,” she told her daughter off-handedly, her focus on her reflection.

Erin stared at her mother in disbelief. “Motley? Are you joking? That's hours away. I can't live in Motley.” Her belly churned, and she swallowed hard against a wave of nausea.

“Why not?” Valerie asked, raising her eyebrows, and then taking advantage of the movement to catch a stray hair. “I know it's not ideal, moving your senior year, but what difference does it make? You're leaving to go to college in the fall anyway. Your time here is so short.”

“But, Mom, that's a super small town,” Erin protested. “Do they even have a symphonic band there? All-State tryouts are coming up. I can't miss that.”

“Erin, you've already made All-State twice.” Valerie pulled out a snippet of hair, winced and rubbed her orbital bone.

So many arguments rose that they crowded together Erin's mind and left her stammering. “But… no… uh… I mean, that doesn't matter.” Who wouldn't want to attempt All-State again? And scholarships. And… senior year. And Sean…

But Valerie had never had much interest in Erin's dating habits, she knew, or in her oboe either, so those points would hold no weight. As she struggled for clarity, her mouth continued talking without direction. “Besides, I have to be here for Danny. She's having a really hard time right now.”

“She has a family. She doesn't need you.” In an attempt to cut off the argument, Erin's mother tossed out the most painful, cruel thing she could have ever said to her daughter flippantly, as though it didn't matter in the slightest.

Erin blanched. “Yes, she does!” she insisted, her voice growing increasingly shrill at pace with her growing panic. “I need her too. My life is here. My boyfriend is here. All my opportunities are here. I don't even know Bill. Why would I want to live with him? Can't you just wait to sell the house until I graduate, please?”

“Settle down.” At last, Valerie set her toiletries aside and met her daughter's eyes. “No, the sale can't wait. We're moving over Thanksgiving break.”

“I won't go with you,” Erin insisted, shaking her head from side to side rapidly. The movement did nothing to quell her rising nausea. “I'm eighteen. I don't need to live with my mother anymore.”

“How will you support yourself, Erin? You don't earn much playing in the symphony.” Valerie's calm, reasonable tone annoyed her daughter further.

“I'll figure something out,” Erin snapped. “Don't worry about me. You never have anyway. I'll take care of it myself.”

“Don't be like that. Please just consider it.” Valerie rose and laid her hand on Erin's arm.

“I won't. My God, you're selfish. I'm not going anywhere.” Erin jerked away from her mother and fled the house. She didn't slam the door, although the part of her that was still a teenager wanted to.

Hopping into her car, she drove over to Sheridan's, needing her friend's advice. I can't leave, she recited to herself as she drove. Band. All-State. Scholarships. Danny…and Sean. Especially Sean. I need him more than I need the mother who never wanted me. Pressure in her lungs made her aware that she'd been holding her breath. She released air in a slow sigh that helped quell her roiling belly.

Time to face the facts, she told herself. You're pregnant. You're also a senior in high school. Yes, it's embarrassing, but at least you'll be able to graduate before… before the baby is born.

Baby. For the first time since this crisis began, she pictured in her mind what the blue line on a stupid white stick actually told her.

I might have a boy. A little boy with dark hair and Sean's beautiful blue eyes. And he will be mine to keep forever. She didn't know what all the ramifications would be, but she suddenly felt certain she would never regret having Sean's baby. She placed her hand on her flat belly and let the slow joy spread over her. It can't be changed. There's nothing left to do but celebrate it.

At the Murphy home, Erin rang the doorbell and waited anxiously on the step. Today, agitated as she felt about the prospect of moving away, the perfectly symmetrical windows of the second floor glared down at her with malicious intent, and the four fluted white columns on the porch closed around her like bars on a jail cell. Time stretched out endlessly before the door opened.

Mr. Murphy, his expression grumpy, glared down at her. She suddenly realized how he towered over her, much taller than her father. With his salt and pepper hair and rugged, sun-browned face, his heavy forehead and dark eyebrows, when Roger Murphy glowered, he looked nothing short of dangerous.

She drew back with a sharp intake of breath. What did I do?

Then he recognized her, and his expression lightened. “Oh, it's you, Erin. Come in. Sorry to keep you waiting. Someone has been playing with the doorbell, ringing and running away. I didn't know if anyone was here.”

“Oh, okay. Sorry. Is Danny here?” She willed her heart to slow its nervous pounding. He wasn't angry with you. Calm down. Breathe.

“Yes, she's in her room. Come on.” He indicated the interior with one hand, and she stepped past him over the threshold and into the cozy warmth of the Murphy family's formal living room. The interior of the house provided all the welcome the exterior had lacked, as though being in this place somehow changed everything.

Erin climbed the stairs, her legs unsteady. I hope Sheridan can help me think through this mess, so I can find a way to stay. Moving to stupid Motley just isn't an option.

Sheridan lay on her belly on a shaggy lavender area rug, struggling through a page of balancing chemical equations. She had a pile of homework spread all over the floor. Her history book and a copy of A Midsummer Night's Dream lay nearby. Looks like she's got a big night. Of course, she might just be reading the Shakespeare for fun, too.

“Danny?”

Sheridan lifted her head and a wide, glowing smile spread across her face. “Hi, Erin. I didn't know you were coming over. How are you feeling?”

“I'm feeling fine,” she lied. “I can see you're busy, but I need some advice.”

“Erin, I'm never too busy for you, sweetie,” she said, turning over and rising to a sitting position. “What's up?”

“Mom's moving,” Erin blurted, sinking to sit cross-legged on the rug beside her friend. She tugged at the lush pile with her fingers.

Sheridan took the news in stride, not showing surprise. “Where?”

“To Motley, to live with him. She wants me to go with her.” Unkind thoughts crowded Erin's mind, but she pushed them away. Being angry with Mom is not important and will only distract me from finding a solution.

The pronouncement garnered a reaction. The corners of Sheridan's eyes tightened. She sat up taller. “When?”

“Next week.”

Sheridan's jaw sagged, and then her lip sneaked between her teeth, where she worried it nervously. “You can't move now! What about… everything?”

So much everything I don't even know where to start. “I know. I don't want to go, but what am I going to do? I can't afford an apartment on my salary from the symphony, and I don't want to get a better-paying job. I don't have time to ring up groceries or wait tables. I have so much practicing and homework to do…” Erin gushed out, blushing but unable to stop babbling.

“And you're pregnant,” Sheridan added softly, “so the last thing you need is this kind of stress.”

“Right. Can you help me think? I'm all in a panic.” Erin pressed both hands to her belly as though to shield the tiny life inside from her raging emotions.

Sheridan considered, and then her consternation dissolved into another smile. “Actually, the solution is easy. Come with me.”

Sheridan led Erin back through the house to the family room, where her parents watched the news on a set of matching tan recliners.

“Mom, Dad?” Sheridan said to get their attention.

“Yes, darling?” Mrs. Murphy replied, pressing the mute button on the remote. Both parents turned to face the girls.

“I need to ask a favor of you,” Sheridan said, speaking slowly and with confidence. “Erin's mom is moving and wants to take her away. I can't have that. I need Erin too much, and besides, she has a ton of stuff going on here that she has to do to get ready for college. She can't afford to live alone, so I thought, can she just stay with us until the fall? With Sean and Jason both moved out, there's plenty of room, and it would be great to have her around all the time.” Unlike Erin's hysterical gush, Sheridan used the calm, rational tone one would expect from an attorney addressing the court.

“Hmmm,” Mrs. Murphy hummed, considering. “I don't mind having Erin here. That would be fine. But, dear, would your mother agree?”

“I'm eighteen,” Erin replied stiffly. “It's not her decision.”

“I see. There's some tension between you, isn't there?” Mrs. Murphy reached out, grasped Erin's hand, and patted it.

“Not tension exactly,” Erin said cautiously, not wanting to sound disrespectful. “I just don't think much of her choices these days.”

“I hate to say this, but I agree with you.” Ellen released Erin's hand and turned to face her husband.

“Roger, what do you think about Erin moving in with us?”

“I don't see it as a problem,” he replied. He continued speaking. “Would you like that, Erin? Sheridan has done most of the talking.”

Erin found it interesting to note that when he relaxed, Roger Murphy's craggy face only suggested safety and protection, no threat at all. “I would love it. You're both so kind.” Her voice cracked, and she struggled not to break down. Will they still be so welcoming when they find out about Sean and me… and the baby? It's not a secret that can be kept for long, but I need a little longer. I'm still coming to terms with it myself. I'm not ready to share. Not yet.

“All right then, why don't you pack up and move in right away?” Mrs. Murphy suggested, tucking a strand of curly silver and gold hair behind her ear and smiling so her hazel eyes crinkled in the corners.

Erin smiled in relief. “Wonderful. I'll do that. Bless you, both.”

As the girls walked away, Sheridan grinned hugely. I've missed that smile these last few weeks, but she's smiled more in the last half hour than she has in the previous month.

“I'm so excited,” Sheridan gushed, her reasonable demeanor dissolving into adolescent enthusiasm. “I can't wait for you to get here. Where do you want to sleep? I bet Sean's old room would be appealing.”

“You have no idea,” Erin replied, “but I don't know if I would dare. Isn't there a guest room?”

“It's too small for more than a few nights,” Sheridan reminded her as they passed the tiny door.

“Oh, that's right. I remember that place from hide and seek. It's like a big closet with a bed in it.”

“Right.” Sheridan continued, “Besides, I think he would like you being there. Since you guys not ready for... the whole family thing just yet, it would be the next best thing.”

“You might be right. Okay, I'm going back to my … my mother's house to start packing up. Finish your homework. I'll see you in a while, okay?”

“Sure, sweetie. I'm so glad you're not leaving. I don't know what I would do without you.” Sheridan threw her arms around Erin and hugged her.

 

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