The Happy War

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The Happy War - book excerpt

Prologue

She pushed the elevator button and stared at the ominous text. “Hurry, there’s something wrong.” Tom Rainer had sent it an hour ago. During that time, she had been bogged down, listening to a tedious analytical report ordered for a real estate transfer in North Virginia. Under the white lab coat, Dr. Jackie Bloomfield wore a gray pantsuit and fashionable red pumps. The stylish new shoes squeezed her toes. The lined, designer outfit started out comfortable, but now, bordered on sweltering hot. Maybe the message made her nervous.

Inside, the sleek, modern building of the New England Municipal Water Testing headquarters, everything appeared normal. Men and women in lab coats tested water for hardness, lead, copper and contaminants. Under bright florescent lights, scientists poured water into beakers, checking for unusual particulates under a microscope. Small plastic containers with tiny glass vials cluttered the countertops. Stainless laboratory freezers lined the pale blue walls.

“There you are,” said an agitated Tom. A few people turned, briefly greeting the respected doctor, but they turned back to the immediate chores they were working on. Pointing towards the back of the lab, Tom indicated she should follow. As the Environmental Operations specialist, he oversaw the wastewater treatment for over thirty-five water testing plants in several states. Always serious, Jackie didn’t like the look on his face. She especially didn’t care for his quick, long steps.

“What? Whatever it is, you should lighten up. It’s 2019, way past Y2K and certainly not, the end of the world.” She wanted to smile at him, but the pointy-toed pumps were bringing tears to her eyes. Once they reached the back, he presented his microscope with open palms, the way a host would seat someone at a luxurious restaurant; quietly, and with an air of superiority.

“When titrating and checking for scaling, this showed up. It doesn’t seem that bad, except this is from the water that goes through D.C. All the samples look like this.”

Dr. Bloomfield put her eyes on the microscope and tilted her head to get a better view. “Hmm,” she responded, staying bent over the instrument while trying to hide a smile. “This is the water going toward the White House?”

“Yes, Doctor. It’s not normal. We’ve tested it over and over, several times.”

She stood to face him. “Not much we can do about those enzymes. Rest assured it’s not lethal. I say we keep quiet, and hope it dissipates naturally.” A tear caused by her tight-fitting shoes rolled down a cheek. Tom turned around for a box of tissues, and while he did, he surveyed the room to make sure no one had listened to their conversation.

“Here, how about a tissue? I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“Oh, it’s not that,” she replied, tugging two sheets of the soft paper from the box. “I’m sure the President doesn’t drink tap water. Everything will be fine.”

“But….”

“Tom don’t worry about it. I’d say the marina needs some major testing. Have your team concentrate on that for now, and leave this to me.” Nature will take its course. Imagining the public turmoil something like this would bring upon the water district made her want to forget she ever saw those samples. Right now, the shoes were killing her, and she expected a call from the Bagram Air Base. “I have to go; my boy is going to call tonight.”

Chapter 1

Desperate. Why else would she, Linda Simpson, a fairly attractive, young, and successful businesswoman, be sitting across from an unusual looking pharmaceutical salesman, on a blind date? In all probability, this would be the last time she listened to her sister. Becca had rambled on like an annoying drone, about the features and benefits of Eric. “He’s unlike anyone else you’ve ever met,” she had said. “He’s smart, cute and funny. You’ll love him,” she repeated over and over. “Give him a whirl. I promise you’ll like him.”

Linda looked at Eric’s thick, tortoise-shell glasses, his messy hair, his tattoos, and his pierced nose. What in hell? Despite her uneasy feelings, they had gone to the movies and were sitting across from each other at a diner. She ordered a slice of chocolate cake and a cup of coffee. He opted for fries and a soda.

“I think this movie escaped me somehow,” she said, wondering how a guy like this could sell anything. Didn’t they have to look and appear professional?Was she becoming her mother? Are cool looking, strange people, the new ‘normal’.Are gothic millennials the fresh faces of technology? While she pondered all that, she tried to avoid the glint reflecting off his substantial proboscis. He probably doesn’t even own a suit.

“What do you mean?” He repeatedly jabbed a french-fry into a small container of ketchup. With his faraway gaze, she figured he couldn’t imagine she didn’t understand the film. “It wasn’t that confusing, was it?” He took a bite of french-fry, and dipped again. Jab, jab, jab, until small pieces of potato floated to the top of the sauce.

The scene in front of her looked bad. Bad, as in the horror show she wanted to walk out of hours ago. At least he didn’t hold her hand or try moving his arm, up around to the top of her shoulders, at the cinema. With his weird taste in movies, it was easy to think, they’d have nothing in common.

She shrugged. “I didn’t get it. How did all those people die?”

He bit his lip and smiled. “Don’t you remember the vials in that General’s drawer? In the very beginning of the movie….”

Pursing her lips, she squinted, and thought back to the movie. “Vials, yeah, I guess, but that didn’t seem important at the time. There were so many things going on. I thought they died from some type of poisonous gas.”

“But the baby running the tap…the mom washing dishes, the guy fly-fishing; those were all clues.”

With every clue, another french-fry dived into the blood red sauce. The ketchup made the innocent fries look slaughtered. Defenseless spuds--sliced and fried were heading for Eric’s mouth. None of it made sense. This date, the movie, all of it made her feel separated from reality. Stumped, she took a big bite of cake. Perfect frosting, like her mother used to make, with a trace of espresso. “I don’t get it. How are those clues?” Trying to figure out the apocalyptic movie left her hungry, even mentally depleted.

“Linda, your sister’s a nurse.”

“Yeah, so?” She didn’t see a connection between nursing and warfare. Once he wiped his fingers in a white napkin however, red grease smeared all over, it reminded her of a scene from a different movie, where wounded soldiers were treated with torn bandages, during the Civil War.

“She would have loved it.”

What a strange thing to say. Sure, her sister knew many things about administering medicine, but that didn’t necessarily mean she’d like this film. Eric Anderson didn’t rack up any extra points with his small jab. Only instead of fries and ketchup, this one seemed personal. “What does that mean?”

“The film talks about chemicals that alter brain function. It’s all about chemical warfare. Don’t you see? The world gets wiped out from a mad scientist and his crazy experiment that goes wrong. He puts chemicals in the world’s drinking supply and boom, everyone begins to die. Even that cute baby. As they travel the world, people in the farthest reaches of Asia are dead. There was nothing they could do.” To drive home the point, Eric banged his fist on the laminate table. “It was a great movie.” Smiling smugly, he looked satisfied with his monologue, picked up another french-fry and began assaulting potatoes again.

Now on top of everything else, he made her feel stupid. Nurses, doctors, lawyers and priests received all the respect.Maybe, if he knew something about advertising and marketing, he’d understand. If, he realized how much work, that she, and herco-workers, put into product placement, demographics, behavioral studies, logo designs, complex target marketing, social media blasts, keywords, layouts, ad copy, web content, and press releases, he’d have some clue about branding. Perhaps, if he’d see how her department took raw data, mixed it with technology, swirled in human interaction, responses and reactions to create the hardware and software--of her job—maybe --he’d have insight into her world. But he didn’t ask, and seemed to assume she sat at a desk answering phone calls. Or, even worse, he didn’t care.

“Guess I’d rather see a movie about the opposite.” She picked up her coffee and took a long swig of the cooled, bitter brew. Besides, she wondered how a ‘sensitive guy’ as her sister had called him, could love a movie with so much violence. Linda thought about the word sensitive and Becca’s interpretation. Whether he wore his hair in a man-bun or kept his flannel shirt untucked like an astronomer at a rock concert, his insides were still ego-filled, self-absorbed man. The guy must be some sort of passive-aggressive, that doesn’t ask about her career, and pounds tables like a caveman. As if, nothing mattered. Maybe, at this stage of the game, it didn’t.

“The opposite?” He leaned back and had a strange expression on his face. Wheels were turning but she wondered where he had drifted. His unfocused eyes had momentarily disappeared to a far-off place, maybe miles from the diner. A pale tone brought out the contrast of stubble, and the five o’clock shadow glittered under the diner’s florescent lights. She didn’t mean to throw him for a proverbial loop, and he seemed to ponder her words for several seconds. Listening, before making a quick, hasty reply made her feel better, and gave him brownie points.

That moment made a difference. It had to do with much more than long hair contrasting wildly and horribly, with cowboy-like silver snaps on a plaid shirt. While he appeared to be a paradox in many ways, and a myriad of mysterious disparities, she felt herself opening up to him. Meanwhile, her mind’s eye saw a fortune wheel, flashing neon letters that spelled out ‘proceed with caution’. Imagining her foot on thin ice, she stood blindfolded on the edge of destiny. Though apprehensive and risky, she moved forward. Her mouth didn’t want to stop. She began to explain what she thought about everything.

“Yes!” Under the table her feet danced across the frozen pond. He’s listening. Don’t be shy, she said to herself. I have to tell him how I feel about movies that glamorize violence. “Doesn’t all the hate bother you?” Every night she heard the senseless killings on the evening news; the shootings, the road rage, the incredible pain of survivors. “Well, why not? Why not create chemical warfare that destroys depression, irritability, bad moods and aggressive behavior?”

“For real?” Eric began to laugh, and she noticed he had attractive dimples. He laughed so hard he grabbed his napkin and had the decency to hold it in front of his mouth before pieces of potato shot across the table. She wondered what he found so funny. “Oh, my God, that is hilarious.” The boisterous outburst almost made him choke. Tears rolled down his cheeks.

“What?” She rolled her eyes, thinking he might be short a fuse or two. “What did I say?”

“I sell those things. You described the symptoms. Ketamides, anesthetics, and antidepressants like Paraxethines, Zolough. I’m sure you’ve heard of Woezap.”

What the heck was he laughing about? “Okay, yes. I’ve heard of some of those.” She stabbed her fork into a piece of cake and brought it to her lips. Before she could enjoy the delicious morsel, he touched another nerve.

He pointed at her plate. “Some people order cake because they have low serotonin levels.”

Linda placed her fork down. “Are you telling me I’m depressed?”

“I don’t know, are you?” He chuckled again and even snorted. “Hey, I’m just kidding.”

“Rest assured, I’m fine,” she mumbled in a soft tone. Scanning the diner, she lowered her voice. “But that movie gave me a spectacular idea. Wouldn’t it be great to put Woezap in the world’s water supply?” Thoughts zigzagged like lightening in her mind. Why would I tell this stranger my innermost thoughts? Must be those sincere looking, amber eyes, or maybe the big nose makes him appear trustworthy. Embarrassed, she looked into her coffee cup. She felt red circles burning on her cheeks. I hope he didn’t drug me. And though it was way too early to tell, by some strange turn of cosmic events, Becca may have been right.

“That would be awesome,” he replied with a big grin. “It would also be a huge crime.”

No, it has to be the dimples. She took a bite of cake and swallowed. “It might be worth it.”

Chapter 2

Three days had passed, and she decided to give the guy another chance. Outside of interesting looks, he had what appeared to be a gentle soul. Plus, he listened, and that alone made a huge difference. Though he didn’t seem too interested in her job, his intense, piercing eyes focused on her lips, as if everything she said was somehow important. Normally insecure, filled with trust issues, relating to old boyfriends, like Wayne, most of her doubt vanished around Eric.

When she saw his car however, she began to think she should walk, and rather quickly, towards a galaxy faraway. “It’s a nice ride but what’s all the stuff on the seats?” The gleaming sportscar seemed to shout ‘single and loving it’ to curious passersby.

“Oh those, sorry, I’ll move them. Samples—you know the type of samples I give doctors.”

“They look like notebooks.”

Eric tossed some of the boxes into the back seat. “Right? Each sample comes with some information from the manufacturer. It also includes a list of side effects, legal mumbo-jumbo and descriptions of current advertising campaigns.” A few of the cardboard folders had slipped onto the passenger side floor. Out of breath and embarrassed, he scooped them up and threw them behind his seat. “We also provide each doctor with emergency phone numbers in case something goes wrong. These are all FDA approved medications, but you never know.”

“Can you see out the back window?”

“I hope so.” He slipped in behind the wheel and patted the passenger seat with his hand. “I think it’s safe to enter now.”

Still hesitating, she moved away, slowly. Something felt different. The feeling rubbed her the wrong way. “Maybe we’ll do this some other time,” she said, leaning down to catch his eyes. But he stared right back into her blue ones. They seemed to plead along with his words.

“Oh, come on. I have something to show you.”

They had spoken briefly on the phone. She told him she had enjoyed the cake at the diner. He wanted to make up for the bad movie by taking her to a brewery where they had computer games, billiards, darts, and dancing. But what had sounded fun on the phone, didn’t appeal to her at the moment. “I don’t know.”

“Come on, please. I’ve been thinking about what you said, and I have to show you something.” He started the engine.

What? What had she said? Eric made her crazy and she couldn’t figure out whether he made her crazy in a good way or a bad way. It felt palpable and electric. Perhaps this was what they meant by chemistry. “Oh, okay. Since you put it like that.” She got in, nestled into the bucket seat, closed the car door, but kept wondering what he meant. Wearing jeans and cowboy boots, she thought she’d fit right in at the country bar. “I’ve never done any line dancing,” she stated, locking in the seatbelt.

They moved towards downtown and he stopped at a light. “I’ve never line danced, two-stepped or dosey-doed either. I guess there’s a first time for everything.”

Silence filled the car for at least five minutes. No computer disc or radio and they didn’t talk. When it looked like he passed the turn for the bar, she spoke up. “Isn’t that place on Main Street?”

“It is, but don’t forget, I want to show you something before the sun goes down.”

“That’s cool. As long as you don’t kidnap me; it’s not like I know you that well.”

A dimpled grin lit up his face. “Are you kidding? I’d love to kidnap you. You’re the prettiest girl I know.”

“Well that’s only because you hang out in all the wrong places.”

“You’d be shocked at the places I used to hang out.” He laughed at his comment and turned onto a steep, dirt road.

“Shocked in a good way or shocked and saddened?”

“Probably both—I did two tours, Fallujah in Iraq and Syria. They sent me right into combat, back in ‘04.”

Now things began to make sense. “I’m impressed. Thank you for your service, Eric.” She tried to imagine him wearing camouflaged clothes and a helmet. “Marines?”

“Semper Fi, baby!”

That explained the small scars on his hand. Her eyes focused on his knuckles gripping the steering wheel. “Are those scars from Iraq?”

“Shrapnel, I have small scars all over. And yes, Iraq.”

Well, she wasn’t interested in seeing them. Not in the least. Keep them hidden soldier boy. The twisting road grew narrow, and the incline increased along with her heart rate. This had to be one of the stupidest things she had ever done. Why would she allow herself to fall into such a vulnerable position?

Gradually, trying not to be obvious, she inhaled, filling her lungs with air, hoping to calm errant nerves with breathing exercises. Exhaling slowly, she asked an obvious question. “Now, you’re scaring me. Where are you taking me Eric?” Not wanting to scream, and knowing it wouldn’t help anyway, she forced her cheeks into a smile.

“Don’t worry. The view is lovely up here.” The car bounced along the rocks and dust, finally reaching a ledge next to a behemoth water tower. Pointing ahead, he said, “Look at that sunset.”

“Reminds me of a song about California sunsets,” she began to hum the song until he stopped the engine. “Unless you’re delusional, we’re not at the make-out stage yet,” she intoned, gazing down at the city below. “But you’re right, it’s breathtaking.”

“I know, I know,” his voice excited, he smiled, and held up the palm of his hand to indicate he wanted silence. “Look around, there’s no one within five miles. No city sounds at all, just peace and quiet.”

“So, I noticed,” she replied, wondering whether he’d kill her now, or later. She began a mental inventory of her purse, and the items she could use as possible weapons: a pen, lipstick, a compact with a small mirror, a wallet with five dollars and some coins. If I thrust the pen into his jugular, I might have a chance. If he ties me up, I might be able to use part of the mirror to cut the rope. Fortunately, I have a cell phone, but this area doesn’t look like it gets any reception.

Maybe, I could use the mirror to flicker a distress signal and tie his hands behind his back with the shoulder straps? The more she thought about it, the worse it looked. All the contents in her purse might be heavy enough to slam on his head. I don’t have a flaming chance in a bonfire. He had been a soldier trained to kill. He outweighs me by at least twenty-five pounds. Her eyes were drawn to the rough ink drawing of barbed wire around his biceps. On top of everything else, he could drug me with his sample stash, in the back seat. This is crazy, but I can’t show fear. “You have so many pills. What kind are they?” She managed to squeak.

“Linda, the reason we’re here is because I want to help you. You know, that idea you had about changing the world?” Pivoting his body, he turned to face her.

“Huh?” He’s not a killer. He’s not a killer. He’s not a killer, kept reverberating in her mind. Fear coursed through her veins. She had to convince herself he had good intentions, or she couldn’t breathe. She slipped her left hand into her purse and grasped the pen while watching his eyes. They looked soulful and gentle, like the police sketches at the post office.

“You talked about…”. He sighed, paused and started over. “You had this incredible idea about putting Woezap in the world’s water supply. And, I’m willing to help you do it.”

Trapped by an apparent madman, her eyes scanned the horizon but returned to her captor. He’s insane. She tilted her head, like a dog trying not to fail obedience school. What did he just say? Did she hear him correctly?

“Are you crazy?”

“Good question, we’ll get back to that later. Seriously, everything you said at the diner made sense. The despicable acts that humans are committing, need to be eliminated. Violence and hate are at an all time high. It’s like an epidemic and maybe we can “cure” it.

“Right, the world does need a kick in the ass, but why would I, or we, be the ones to do it?” Nervous laughter made her turn back to the gorgeous view. She relaxed her grip on the pen. They’ll never find my body anyway.

“Listen Linda, I’m serious. In addition to my experience with WMD’s, I feel the two of us are strong enough, both mentally and physically, to carry it off. That’s one reason I brought you here. See this water tower? It’s easy to access. They are built without too many locks. The reservoirs and the underground aquifers are easy to manipulate.”

The small hairs on the back of her neck stood at attention. This geeky guy, though obviously not a murderer, and perhaps seriously demented, had characteristics that made her listen. There were unexplainable, unusual things she liked about him. Especially, when he described her as strong. “No one drinks tap water anymore.”

“But they do. And it doesn’t matter. Where do you think they get bottled water? It’s pumped from clearly accessible mountain springs.”

“What about the Prozzak or Woezap, or whatever? We can’t afford enough of the stuff, and I doubt you’re willing to lose your job by pilfering it.”

“You see Linda, that’s the thing. I have worldwide contacts that work with similar drugs. We would form a team. Plus, I also work in research and development, where they let me experiment. Phloxetine is only one type of serotonin enhancer. There’s also sitalopram, certraline, paraxethine….”

Waving her hand, she cut him off. “Okay, I get it. There’s more than Woezap. Are we going to steal it?”

He inhaled and began a litany of staccato answers. “Not really. See all these samples? They have five to ten pills in each folder. Some have more. The companies are desperate to get these into the hands of doctors. I have other friends who sell pharmaceuticals. In fact, I’ve been with this company for five years. They treat me pretty good,” he said with an audible sigh. “They pay me well and yup, they trust me.” Eric squinted and bit his lower lip. “That goes back to the military. I served with my boss and many of the other employees. Lucky for me, I outranked almost everyone. They talk to me with respect. Our entire staff wants the world to know the truth about chemicals.”

Words escaped her. She nodded. My kind of insane, she thought, forgetting her fear.

“I realize doing this will be a risk. But come on, it’s a risk I’m willing to take, especially, if I can save children, and all the innocents being victimized.” His impassioned speech didn’t end there. Tears rimmed his eyes. “I want you to know that whatever I do, it’s all the way. All or nothing.”

“But…” she tried to interrupt.

“No ‘buts’ Linda. Every inch of my heart wants to do this. Ever since our first date when you mentioned this, I haven’t been able to sleep. Plus, I have loyal friends everywhere; Paris, Rome, Vienna, Ottawa, Cape Town and a slew of other places. I speak Spanish, and a little French. Some of my best contacts are in Mexico and South America. Those guys are thrilled to have U.S. doctors asking for their products. I can get my hands on enough Woezap and Zolough to make your head spin.”